What does love look like to you?
To me, love looks like a 77 year old woman who was the youngest person I knew until last week. Love stepped up to the plate to care for her grandkids because they were her own. Love drove them to school each day, went to their baseball games, and cooked them dinner each night of the week. Despite all this, Love also had time for me and countless other women.
When I met her in my early 20’s in Austin, Texas, all the younger women at church called her “Mama Sandy.” She opened her heart to me and the doors of her home too when I needed a place to stay once. After I left Austin, got married, and became a mom myself, Sandy sent cards and notes. One year when I moved back, she met me for coffee twice a month. I’ve lived most of my adult life overseas, but across all those years and all those miles, she’d send text messages and we’d talk on the phone. She was always waiting for me when I returned home.
Last week Sandy went to be with Jesus.
Overnight, countless pictures of her and other women who called her mom flooded my Facebook feed. They each told a story. “She held watch over the birth of my stillborn child.” “I wouldn’t be alive if not for her; she counselled me out of depression.” “She called me on my birthday for 27 years.”
The woman radiated the love of God.
She gave me a gift I know God wants me to give away.
He’s opening my eyes again to women around me who need moms and sisters.
One lives right here in my house.
I can’t reach out to others without reaching my 17 year old gem of a girl first. We go on walks, watch movies, drink chai tea latte, laugh ourselves silly, and cry together too. Each morning over breakfast she wrecks me with her insight into scripture.
One lives in another city.
It’s crazy, but God called me to make room in my heart for one more. So now I have a girl named Grace who’s a grace gift to me. We text and talk on the phone. She’s a college student, and I can’t wait for her to come to my house for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don’t know what difference it can make for Grace to have a mom hundreds of miles away, but I’m willing to step up to the plate and find out.
Honestly, showing up for these girls scares me. I don’t always get it right. I make mistakes and say the wrong thing, but I choose trust. God can use my small, imperfect efforts to touch lives.
What about the sisters and daughters in your world?
Maybe someone around you needs a simple gift of love today. She might be sitting behind you at church. Maybe she works right next to you. She could be your daughter’s best friend or the cashier who drives you crazy at the grocery store.
Smile when you look at her.
Let Her Know She Matters.
Let her know God sees her
Tell her that He loves her and you do too.
Share your heart and life.
Send her a text.
Have lunch with her.
Offer to watch her kids.
Invite her to dinner.
Buy her some groceries.
Pray for her.
Love shows up in a thousand different ways, but it changes lives. Love wears a thousand different skins, but it looks like Jesus.
Now it’s your turn: Do you have a spiritual mom, sister, or daughter?
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I’m linking up with Holly Barrett’s #TestimonyTuesday, #RaRaLinkup at Katie Reid’s, Holley Gerth’s Coffee for your Heart, Arabah Joy’s Grace and Truth, and Suzie Eller’s #livefreeThursday. Suzie’s prompt is “delighting the heart of God.” Check out these communities for more encouragement.
Oh Betsy, what a legacy of love your sweet Mama Sandy left for others when she went to join her loving Savior. Praying for you. May we all remember the impact we can have on just one life when we share love like Sandy did – the love of Jesus.
Amen, Kristine! I know you are doing it. Praying for your impact at your school and community right now.
The world seems a little emptier when we lose people like your dear friend. Thank you for sharing your resolve not to let her example of mentoring and building fall to the ground. We’re it, aren’t we, Betsy? As the generations ahead of us get promoted to heaven, it’s on us to be the “older women.” May God give us wisdom and grace to step into those beautiful shoes.
That’s right, Michele. We’re it now! I was amazed at how many women on Facebook I saw reflecting on the same thing. Even younger women than us. <3
What a gift your friend was, and I’m sure her actions still impact even now that she is now home. It can be hard to show up for others especially if not sure we are saying the right thing, or even wanted! Thanks for being an inspiration for me today to keep my eyes open to serving another who just may need someone to know that they care.
Yes, Lynn. I’m sure that what she left with me is mine forever. And it’s a gift we’re called to pass on!
What a beautiful friend and example of love! I am sorry to read of Sandy’s loss because of the gift she gave to you for so many years. I just listened recently to your podcast with Holly Barrett and I know now you have a heart to be the love for other women. You are living it out in your own life and it is a gift you are now sharing with others.
This post speaks directly to me and my heart. I also desire to be the love for other women and am praying and seeking to be this gift for too. There are not enough of us who wish to mentor and just be there when others are going through ordinary life which to them might look anything but ordinary. These words will stick with me… “Love shows up in a thousand different ways, but it changes lives. Love wears a thousand different skins, but it looks like Jesus.” Amen.
Thank you, Mary. May the Lord bless you greatly and use you greatly to touch others. Thanks for listening to the podcast with Holly. It was lots of fun!
It sounds like Mama Sandy will be greatly missed by many. What a wonderful tribute you’ve written for her here, Betsy. And I love and appreciate your call to action for us all to follow in her footsteps. Like you, I start with my beautiful daughter who is thankfully under my roof for the next few months before college starts. I’m using every precious moment wisely :).
Wow, I hope you have a wonderful time with your daughter, Candace. My daughter will take a gap year, so we’re not sure how much longer she’ll be with us. But yes, the time is precious.
Oh Betsy! So beautiful! I know it is so hard to be away right now. There is comfort in talking, hugging, crying with other Mama Sandy daughters. Her service was wonderful. Rose sang His Eye is on the Sparrow. There was worship, laughter, and lots of tears. I’ve been thinking a lot about Love. And how she had such a infinite capacity to love us all. It was all Jesus! Which means we can also strive to love others more and better. Big hug my friend. Sandy loved you so much!
Yes, Kathy! It was Jesus! that’s my conclusion too. Thanks for your kind words. Last week I talked with Anne and Lyn three days in a row, and they both wrote me today. Also with two women in my country who miss her greatly. So that did help. Does help. Tears still come at times. <3
These have been my thoughts and God’s challenge to me, as well, Betsy, since the day Sandy left us. I can’t be Sandy, can’t take her place or fill her shoes, but I can follow her beautiful example and love like Jesus loves. Jesus living in and through me may not look exactly like Sandy but, by God’s grace, it can look like Jesus, and that is my prayer.
That’s so right on, Ruth. Let’s look like Jesus. That’s what we want, isn’t it? I love your thoughts here.
Betsy, did you know your words wreck me? Deep in me, your words resonate. And the sound is magnificent.
Thank you for faithfully sharing.
Hugs. Susan
Oh Susan. Your words mean SO much to me right now. This is one of the best compliments I’ve received in a while, friend. Thank you.
Betsy, what a beautiful post. And I’m so sorry you’ve lost someone so dear to you. I know you’ll see her again, but the missing here and now is painful. Thank you for the reminder to look for those women in my life who I can love on. Being the mother of boys, there aren’t many girls in my world. But I do have friends. And there are women I see in some of the places you mentioned. I’m going to begin looking for those opportunities.
Thank you!
Oh yes, I have a few SISTERS too, Jeanne. (In real life all I have are brothers. 🙂 )
Faced with a reality in which I felt there were no words to describe my feelings, I realize from reading your post that you have done exactly that, and in a beautiful way. Thank you Betsy.
Thank you, Jan. Blessings to you. I miss you and all our friends.
My sympathies in the loss of your friend, Betsy. She sounds like a wonderful person. I agree with you that there are so many ways to love the people God has put in our lives. The other night I was at book club and when we were socializing afterward, another woman started telling me about a frustrating work situation. When she was finished, she thanked me for listening and showing interest. I realized it is such a small but important thing: to listen. A way of showing love. Thanks for reminding us of love’s many faces and encouraging us to start where we are.
Oh, Betsy…. (((hugs))) What a legacy Sandy left! This is truly a beautiful tribute. xo
Yes, Kristi. I’m so thankful.
To think your Mama Sandy is impacting women she never met….through your words, encouraging us to reach out and connect. This is such a timely post, Betsy. Needing to see how to do Titus 2’ing in my own life. <3
I think you already are, Lisa.
I’m sorry for this great loss, Betsy. We should all be blessed with a loving, godly mentor like Mama Sandy in our lives …
She radiated Jesus, didn’t she …
Thank you, Linda. Yes, she did radiate Jesus!
What a full life she led and a legacy she leaves!
My Mom and both grandmothers were like that and I still hear how much they touched others’ lives. May we all be Mama to those around us.
Amen, Sarah! Let’s do it! Let’s be moms and sisters.
Betsy,
I am so sorry for the loss of Sandy. Thank you for carrying on her legacy by blessing other young women. I thought of you when I heard of T. on the radio and it reminded me to pray for you and your family. May God continue to bless others through you and your family 🙂
Thanks so much, Dolly. Your prayer means so much to me. My “Grace” is a young woman from here. <3
Beautiful post. I can see the joy of Jesus on her face. What an inspiring woman! I also have such godly mentors in my life, and I pray God will use me as a mentor for other women.
Thank you, Sarah. She was beautiful! I’m praying for you now, sister, that God will use you greatly.
What a beautiful reflection of Christ your sweet friend was! I know you will miss her greatly. Betsy, this post is an inspiration. I pray that I might share God’s love more faithfully with those around me. Thank you for this encouragement!
Thanks for reading today, Sabra! May the Lord bless and use you greatly!
Your post is a reminder to be thankful for those who have impacted our lives. Also that we can impact others and we will when Christ reigns in our hearts. When self reigns, well thats another story. Good one.
Thanks for reading, Betty. Yes, let’s allow Christ to reign in our hearts. 🙂