Sometimes life brings circumstances you didn’t plan or hope for, and how do you handle it when God changes your plan?
I’m an organizer by nature. I love to make plans and to-do lists. But 9 times out of 10, my plans don’t turn out quite as I expect. I might be skipping through my day making progress on my projects when God allows a change in my situation:
- The car breaks down.
- A child gets sick.
- I get an emergency phone call.
I’m sure these things happen to you too, and I hate to admit sometimes I get bent out of shape when things don’t go according to my plan. But I’m growing and trying to learn to adjust my expectations and accept each day as it comes.
We may not like the small setbacks that crop up in our day, but we can trust God’s plan. We can trust Him to use those little disturbances to form Christ in us. I want to let go of my agenda graciously when God sends an interruption my way.
Sometimes God changes more than our agenda for the day.
Major events can change the course of our lives. When I was single, I planned to start a new job, yet instead I got severe rheumatoid arthritis and six months at home. When I was 28, I got engaged, but my fiancé changed our plans. We didn’t marry until four years later.
Circumstances we don’t plan or want have a way of showing up in our lives. We don’t plan on infertility. We never plan to get laid off or have a child who struggles with depression, but even in heartache, we can rest knowing the God who loves us has ultimate control over our lives.
How can you move forward when God changes your plans?
1. Trust God’s Love for You
“The LORD’s unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in him.” (Psalm 32:10)
Even when we can’t understand God’s plans, we can trust His perfect love for us. When life turns topsy turvy, we can rest safely in God’s love. We can trust Him to work for our good and provide our needs while we wait to understand His plan.
2, Surrender Your Expectations
For me, the first step to moving forward with God when my plans go wrong is to let them go. When I surrender my own expectations, I’m freer to realign myself with God. Something about saying, “Your will be done” helps me get to the place of yielding myself to God’s design.
3. Pray
“On the day I called, You answered me; You made me bold with strength in my soul.” Psalm 138:3, NASB
When life takes an unwanted turn, we find the grace, hope, and strength we need to endure through prayer. Asking God for wisdom and patience to do “the next right thing in love” can change our hearts.**
4, Trust Him for Your Next Steps
“He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.” Psalm 25:9
Sometimes our next step in the midst of change is to stop and grieve, resting in God’s love. Sometimes we need to move forward. In the midst of unplanned and unwanted circumstances, God gives us the grace and guidance we need.
Friend, if you’re dealing with unwanted change in your life, may I encourage you to remember your Savior sees your struggle?
With loving compassion, He’ll stay by your side as you learn trust and surrender in your situation. In His timing, He’ll give you wisdom you need to take the right steps forward into the beautiful plan He has designed for you.
Now it’s your turn: Have you experienced an unplanned change in your life recently?
**”Do the next right thing in love” is a phrase from the dear and delightful Emily P. Freeman’s The Next Right Thing podcast.
If you’d like fresh servings of Faith Spilling Over delivered weekly to your inbox, enter your e-mail address in the box in the sidebar. I’d love to send you my free guide, 10 Days to More. You’ll find 10 ways to study and engage with God’s Word.
Linking up with Jennifer Dukes Lee’s #TellHisStory, Holley Gerth’s Coffee for your Heart, Crystal Storms’ #HeartEncouragement, Brenda Bradford Ottinger’s #ChasingCommunity, Lyli Dunbar’s #FaithonFire, and Arabah Joy’s Grace and Truth. Check out these communities for more encouragement.
Thank you so much for this timely message for me today. Plans have been changed and I really needed some reassurance and encouragement to trust in God today. I know it but your encouragement was very welcome today. Thanks as always for all your words, Betsy! Blessings as you follow and move forward in His plans!
Praying for you now, dear Jill. May the Lord encourage you to hold on to Him. He is surely holding on to you.
“When I surrender my own expectations, I am freer to realign myself with God.” Such words of wisdom! What makes me think my expectations are the end all be all and even worthy of my focus? Being forced to let them go is an act of love and mercy and proof they were off track or misguided in the first place. God flings the door wide open to His always better way. Thank you for this reminder!
Yes, His way is always better, isn’t it Melinda? But it’s not always the easy way I’d choose! Love you, friend. Hope you have a great week.
#2 truly hit me, Betsy. Freaking out tends to be my knee-jerk when plans change unexepectedly. And it’s been a wrestling match lately. Surrender is like a douse of cold water, causing me stop and consider. Great post, friend. Great post.
Freaking out is my reaction too! You should have heard me today while making umpteen calls to find out why my daughter’s transcript hasn’t been sent WHILE cooking dinner for a guest at the same time! Not what I would have chosen, but I really had to do it! Surrender. Praying for you, friend.
This is great advice, Betsy! I am a planner too and find it frustrating when those plans don’t work out. Sometimes the little things are more frustrating because it seems so pointless but it’s a good reminder of how little we are actually in control. I especially love your point about trusting God’s love even when we can’t understand his plan.
Yeah, I know what you mean about the little things being hard. Maybe because they take us by surprise??? Somehow I get derailed easily by the little things, whereas I’m more “aware” with bigger things…
Dear Betsy, what a timely message for me! A month ago I was told the job I have loved had been eliminated. Running through the announcement was not so hidden agendas and deception. Over and over I’ve had to claim God’s promise in Jeremiah. It’s time for me to grow trust in my Savior. Thanks and blessings!
Oh Alice! That IS a hard change. I’m so sorry, friend. Praying for you now. May the Lord open new doors and show you new paths. <3
I have the hardest time surrendering my expectations, but God knows that. He is working on me!
He’s working on both of us in that area, Sarah!
Such a good and timely word to read this morning. Surrender and trust have been words in the forefront of my thoughts for a few days. We can surrender our plans and trust the One whose heart towards us is good and all He does is good. May He bless you as you continue to follow His lead!
Amen! May the Holy Spirit work on both our hearts, Joanne. I also have had “Surrender” on my mind for weeks.
Surrendering the expectations . . . this is where I run into trouble every time. Thanks for words that inspire me to a greater trust and a looser hold on my own plans.
Blessings and grace to you, friend. Thanks for reading. 🙂
Betsy,
I so need this post this week. I’ve had several days go “topsy turvy” and for this girl who likes to plan….that doesn’t go over well. Thank you for the reminder that God’s love is still right there in the chaos. And thank you for the invitation to surrender it all to the Lord. The more I fight the distractions and the interruptions, the more I miss something God may want to point out. Thanks for this encouragement to go with God’s flow….and pray….a lot!
Blessings,
Bev xx
Oh Bev, I’m sorry about your topsy turvy, friend. As you say, His love is still right there in it all. May He surround you with His steadfast love this week, friend.
This is a wonderful post and reminder that God knows His plans for us! I appreciate that you included 4 things we can do when we don’t know what to do. We can’t control certain situations, but we can control how we react. Thanks Betsy.
Thanks so much, Laura. It is so true that we CAN control our reactions, but it’s so hard to do, isn’t it? Hope you have a great week.
We wrote about very similar things this week. I would say sometimes my biggest hurdle is surrendering my own expectations. I have my thoughts and ways about me, my own expectations of how things should go yet God is teaching me to be okay when it doesn’t go my way. Not easy but necessary learning because in life it more than often does not go our way and we must make adjustments to what is now our reality. God help me with this one! 🙂
Thanks for these encouraging words. It reminds me of God’s faithfulness in growing us forward.
(Stopping by from #HeartEncouragement) — Rachel Q
I do the same Rachel! I hold on to those expectations and keep myself in a snit when I keep thinking, “It should have been…” or “Well, I thought…” But I’m trying to grow. May the Lord help us both! Amen to moving forward.
I have a good friend who’s battle with cancer isn’t turning out the way anyone planned. Her life and the lives of everyone around her are forever altered. The thing that we’re all learning is that God still has a plan and a will… and is sovereign… over all things, in all times and in all ways even in the most desperate situations that one can imagine. Thanks for the post.
I’m so sorry about your friend, Karen. That sounds so sad. May the Lord pour out His grace over your friend and her loved ones.
This is helpful, Betsy. I read somewhere recently, “An expectation is a resentment looking for a place to happen.” And that can be true with God too: we expect Him to do X or allow Y to happen and when it doesn’t, we can be resentful. Not that there is anything wrong with being honest with the Father about our disappointments and hopes! But recognizing that our ultimate expectation and hope comes from God is so necessary, though I still find it difficult at times.
Wow, that is such a powerful quote, Jeannie. Thank you for sharing that. “An expectation is a resentment looking for a place to happen.” So powerful. I want to remember that. And yes it is so difficult to lay them down.
I’m learning to see God in the unexpected. To actively look for him. To expect to see Him moving there. But our expectations of His action must align with His Word, not just our desires. It hasn’t been easy, but you’re advice here is so spot on and encouraging. Blessings to you, friend!
Amen to seeing God in the unexpected. I needed to hear that today, Liz. Thank you!
So good, Betsy : ) Your point about expectations stand out especially to me. In my recent season of change, I for once avoided setting expectations and committed to accepting God’s surprises as good gifts- and these good gifts have blown any expectation I could have fathomed out of the water. He’s a good surpriser like that! Thanks for this!
That is so good, Bethany: committing to accepting God’s surprises. Wow! May He bless and guide you in this season of change! I’m in one myself, friend!
Thank you for the encouragement! It’s easy to become discouraged and even depressed and hopeless when hopes and dreams are unrealized. Trusting God is the only way through.
Yes, Kim! It’s so true that discouragement knocks on our door when hopes are unrealized. Thanks for chiming in here to encourage us to keep trusting.
Great post and it’s something I can completely relate to! I have always been an athlete and had great plans and aspirations as I got older to run marathons and do triathlons and to do them well. A back and abdominal injury that started 2 & 3 years ago has changed that tune. I mourned the transformation for a tremendous time and grieved my new reality, but God has taught and shown me so much through all of it that I wouldn’t change a thing.
What you have written here is so encouraging and important for others to read!
Thank you, Kay, for sharing your story. I know you have learned a lot. Sorry about your injury anda change in plans. I know the Lord is working something beautiful in you.
for some reason, your posts haven’t been showing up in my feed, Betsy. but i’m glad to have found you today … releasing our expectations can be a very challenging choice and so i’m grateful that’s on your list.
praying ‘Thy will be done’ has been so helpful in recent years as I give up my rights and agendas and plans to rescue, fix, and save.
peace has a better chance of flowing when we get out of the way, doesn’t it …
Sorry my posts aren’t showing up for you, Linda, but so glad you’re here today. Do you know, I’ve also been praying, “Your will be done” some lately, and it is so helpful. Amen to giving up those plans to rescue, fix, and save. Only Jesus can do that! Thanks for your wisdom here.
Trust is the key to accepting God’s plans instead of ours. I try not to put my trust in expectations unless they are of the Lord. I know He will be with me whatever comes my way. Does not mean I don’t struggle for a bit, one time for a whole year I was grieved at the change that came into our lives. That hard time taught me more than any good time I have ever had. Great post.
Yes, Betty! Trust is key, isn’t it? I’m so sorry for your grieving time. Some changes can be very hard, and yes we do learn so much during them. Grace to you, friend.
I have had my share of plan changes. At first, I struggled when my schedule was interrupted but then I learned to say, “It is what it is.” I love your four steps for moving forward. Thank you for sharing with Grace & Truth.
The small schedule changes are always hard for me too, Maree. But I’m learning. I love that phrase, “It is what it is.”
Betsy, I have chosen your post to feature tomorrow on Grace and Truth Christian Link-Up but I had a quick question. I can’t seem to find your email. Will you email me at maree.dee@embracingtheunexpected.com
These are great words, Betsy. I’m evaluating many things right now. Your comment about surrendering expectations struck a chord. Good timing for me.
May the Lord give you wisdom, Dianne, as you evaluate everything on your plate. I know you have a lot going on, friend. May He guide you.
Great post! This is something I think everyone can relate with. If only we can auto schedule your post to hit our inbox the next time this happens. But I am sure in someway it happens to us almost everyday. Last year I felt a very strong calling from God to start something but then just I was getting started the plan got thwarted. I was so discouraged and confused by the message I felt I clearly understood from God. As it turns out the message is still the same it was just a “not now” message but a “someday” message. This year God has cleared my path to finally embark on that journey but it now includes a “do this first” message. So all that to say, I have learned I have to just trust every day and every step to God and his timing. Thanks for this great message and your 4 steps. I pinned it for when I need this reminder.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts here, Laura. I appreciate you sharing your journey. I’ve also embarked on paths I thought God was leading me down, only to discover He had a different timing, but even those “false starts” are part of His perfect plan when we are following Him.
As people become older, they tend to form more and more questions in their minds – “What do I want to do with my life?”, “What are my long-term goals?”, and “Where is my life heading to?” These questions usually come to mind whenever a person is dealing with a life crisis. They can cause a great amount of anxiety, fear, and stress, especially when one is completely clueless about what the future holds for him or her.
Those are very thoughtful questions, David, and yes, they can cause stress! I’m so glad the Lord is our Shepherd. He goes before us. As I get older, I notice life isn’t getting easier, but I need to stick closer to Jesus.