I still remember as if it happened last night how mortified I felt as I struggled to cut a rock-hard pizza for first-time dinner guests. The pizza was ready an hour early when my guests called to say they’d be late. Not knowing what else to do, I left it in the oven on low. By the time our friends arrived, the pizza I’d worked so hard to make had reached a perfect state of petrification.
It was just as hard to eat as it was to cut, and I felt pretty low on the Martha Stewart scale.
Now I can laugh about it, but at the time, I felt embarrassed in front of new friends. It made me feel like I came up short. After all, other women didn’t serve rock pizza to guests.
The petrified pizza incident is long past, but every day I still face all the little ways in which I don’t quite measure up.
- I lose my temper and yell at the kids.
- I waste a whole afternoon surfing the internet.
- We run out of toothpaste. (I’m going on 20 years as a housewife. Can’t I even keep toothpaste in the house, for crying out loud?)
- It’s 5:30. The living room is wrecked with home school materials, and I can tell that dinner’s going to be late.
- I can’t seem to lose the 10 pounds that crept up on me.
If I focus on myself and my weaknesses, pretty soon I feel like a hopeless mess.
Maybe sometimes you have similar thoughts. We start to compare ourselves with others who seem like they have it all together. The voice of the enemy accuses us. “You don’t measure up. You don’t have what it takes, and you’ll never change.”
But God sees a different you.
He sees the daughter He created for Himself. If you’ve put your faith in Christ, He sees the righteousness and perfection of Jesus when he looks at you. You’re a work in progress, and God sees the person you will be when He’s finished with you.
You are beautiful.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made to show God’s glory in a way no one else can. You’re His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for the good works he prepared in advance for you to do (Ephesians 2:10). He will complete the good work He began in you.
You are loved.
You’re the apple of His eye, a prized and precious jewel. God demonstrated His love for you by giving His one and only son. Jesus demonstrated His love for you by dying in your place. What can you say to a love like that?
You are chosen.
You are precious and honored in His sight.
You are more than a conqueror.
You are a new creation.
You can do all things in Christ.
Rather than letting our own thoughts define us, let’s choose to believe what God says about us in His Word. As we lift our faces to heaven and listen for His voice, He’ll shine grace down on us.
This post is a re-edit from my archives.
Do you ever compare yourself with other women and feel you don’t measure up?
In Over It. Conquering Comparison to Live Out God’s Plan, Kristine Brown takes us on a quest to learn how to embrace God’s unique plan for us instead of comparing ourselves with others. (Follow this link for more information.)
In her book, Kristine unearths the stories of three women in Scripture who fell into the comparison trap but learned the key to finding freedom. Walking through their stories, readers will:
- Discover deep truths about the struggle with comparison.
- Find contentment in their God-given uniqueness.
- Take easy-to-follow steps toward claiming victory over comparison.
- Realize God’s plan is more than we could ever imagine.
- Learn how to say, “I’m over it” and mean it.
I’m linking up with Holly Barrett’s Testimony Tuesday, Kelly Balarie’s #RaRaLinkup, Crystal Storms’ Intentional Tuesday, Holley Gerth’s Coffee for Your Heart, Lyli Dunbar’s Thought-Provoking Thursday, Arabah Joy’s Grace and Truth, and Susan B. Mead’s Dance with Jesus. Check out these communities for more encouragement.
<3 This is just perfect for me right now! Thanks, Betsy!
Praying for you now, Liz!
I can totally relate to the pizza story! (I mention that time in one of the book’s chapters, except mine was enchiladas!) Thank you so much for mentioning the book as a resource here Betsy.
May the Lord use your book to reach many with this important message, Kristine!
Remembering we are loved by a big and amazing God seems to be a lesson that I need to be reminded of over and over. We are human so we are not perfect but God chose not to make us perfect. He gave us limitations so we would turn to Him to fill in the gaps of our weaknesses. Thank you for reminding us all today that God thinks we are beautiful, loved, and string even when we don’t feel any of those things.
I need to be reminded over and over myself, Mary! May we rest in His love today. Hope you’re getting settled back into life after your tirp.
This is such a trap – and so self-defeating. Your words are a ray of hope. When we know that God values us in spite of failures — that He does not measure us by the Martha Stewart yard stick — we can rest in His love.
I love the personal stories you share.
Thanks, Michele. May you sense God’s grace shining on you today, friend.
What a fabulous truth to start my day off with! Thank you, Betsy, for this beautiful reminder!
You’re welcome. I need this reminder myself. constantly. 🙂
Amen sister! I hear ya on all of this. I am so thankful for God’s grace in our lives and the way He meets us right where we are! He is so good to us! (Stopping by from #IntentionalTuesday)
He is indeed good, Rachel. Meets us right where we are, as you say. Have a great week, sister!
I’m very glad that God doesn’t see me as I see me. Grace, all grace! Thanks for sharing these beautiful truths of hope and love, Betsy!
You’re welcome, Lisa. I’m thankful for grace too. 🙂
Betsy: This was a great post, congratulations on clarity of writing, transparency in your life and practical encouragement.
Love
Your husband Jose
Awww! Amorcito, you are the best!
What a beautiful reminder for my heart, Betsy. It’s so easy to focus on all the ways I fall short, but God … His Word tells me I’m chosen and loved … even when the floors need cleaned and dinner is late again. Thank you, friend. : )
I think we’re our own biggest critics sometimes, Crystal. Oh yes, we’re chosen and loved, hard to remember that sometimes!
Beautiful post, Betsy. I can sooooo relate to nearly every one of your “not quite measuring up” list items. Isn’t it funny how those little seeds take root and become fully grown plants, bearing not-so-good fruit? Kristine’s book is a keeper, speaking to hearts just like your post has. #raralinkup
Yes, if we let them, those lies take root in our hearts, don’t they. I like what Jeannie said in her comment about replacing the lies with truth. Grace to you, Kristi.
and this you said and I have done, Betsy –>’perfect state of petrification’
;-}
I guess petrification can be a perfect state too! Have a great week, Linda.
Hi Betsy! I don’t remember reading this post before, so it’s new to me! I like seeing myself as God does, and not how I do. I think we can be the hardest on ourselves. Even harder than the judgements of others. What crazy things we’ll believe…
Your pizza story is totally something I would do. I’m Irish, and in our family, that means I’m not much of a cook. Keep it in the oven? Sounds good to me!
We are chosen, precious and honored. Those are some great words, and something I can work on truly accepting and embracing.
Blessings,
Ceil
Usually, Ceil, I’m a pretty good cook, but I’m my own worst critic for sure. My family had to get after me because as soon as I dish up the food, I start talking about what’s wrong. I’ve learned not to do that. Yes, let’s embrace God’s truth about us.
I’m loving Kristine’s book! Comparison really is universal, isn’t it? Such a tool the enemy uses to keep us from the rest and grace that are our in Christ. Thank you, Betsy!
Have a great week, Lisa.
On Sunday we had a therapist give an afternoon seminar at our church on anxiety in children and teens. She spoke about many concepts that I think dovetail very well with what you’ve said here: dismantling lies that we tell ourselves (or that others tell us) and understanding the truth about who we are. Clearly this is important for us to understand at any stage of our lives.
Oh, I wish I could have heard that seminar, Jeannie. It sounds good. Replacing lies with truth is such an important theme, for kids and teens too.
“You’re a work in progress, and God sees the person you will be when He’s finished with you.” Beautiful truth, Betsy. This is the second time today that I’ve seen this–expressed in different ways, but the same idea. Clearly, it’s something I need to read and remember! I’m always glad to see you next door when I link up somewhere in the early morning hours!
Thank you Lois. May God plant His truth deep in our hearts.
Choosing to believe what God says…yes! In everything. But about ourselves seems so much harder sometimes, at least to me. Thank you for speaking His Word so clearly, here, Betsy!
And…yeah…I have one of those pizza stories too. Except it was Chicken and Biscuits. Can laugh now, too! : )
I think we all have one of those pizza stories. You should try my hockey puck biscuits, Bethany! I bet you’d feel better about yours. 🙂
But yes, let’s believe God’s truth about who we are rather than compare whose biscuits are best. 🙂
I think we all have one of those pizza stories. You should try my hockey puck biscuits, Bethany! I bet you’d feel better about yours. 🙂
But yes, let’s believe God’s truth about who we are rather than compare whose biscuits are best. 🙂
Betsy,
I love how you remind us to let God’s thoughts define who we are and not our own thoughts when they tend to comparison and feeling not enough…I always need to be reminded so thank you 🙂
I am fearfully and wonderfully made for His purpose in specific ways. That’s huge! There is no one like me and I serve a purpose for my God. This is the promise I want to hold onto today. Thanks you for these loving words of encouragement. Visiting from coffee for your heart #34
Thanks for visiting, Kristina. I pray you’ll be used by God in wonderful ways to serve His unique purposes for Beautiful YOU!
Hi Betsy,
So nice to be your neighbor at Holley’s today. I laughed at the story of your pizza and I’m still laughing about your toothpaste-stocking abilities! Thank you for reminding us how God sees us is far better than we see ourselves!
Hopefully you’re better at keeping toothpaste in the house than I am, Valerie! But at any rate, we’re both beautiful in His eyes, right?
Betsy,
Just when I think I won’t get sucked into the comparison trap, the crafty enemy lures me in…look at her, she definitely has it more together than you do….and so the little voice goes. Thank you for reminding us of God’s truth. Lord, let me keep lining up the little voice beside your truth and if it doesn’t match up…then I need to kick the lies to the curb. I will have to check out Kristine’s book.
Blessings,
Bev
It’s true, Bev. We keep getting lured in even though we’ve learned this lesson like 10,000 times, right? 🙂 Grace to you, sister, as you kick those lies to the curb.
Bev, jumping in here to say hello. I think you will like the scriptural truths shared in the book and the stories of the biblical women also. If you get a chance to read it, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Blessings:)
Beautiful, Betsy! Thank you for these powerful words of encouragement! Indeed, it is always good to be reminded of how God see us. Have a blessed week!
Thank you, Leigh Ellen. I hope you’ll have a great week too.
Betsy, A topic so near and dear to my heart. We fall into that comparison trap so easily feeling as though we just simply are not enough. As a young girl and woman, I ached deeply for that very reason. I never understood until my 30s truly how God saw me. I didn’t understand my worth. Knowing that has changed everything for me. It has brought me so much freedom to just be me!
I love this post and am sharing it everywhere!
Blessings and smiles,
Lori
Thank you for sharing this. It’s a topic close to my heart too. I don’t think I understood more about how God sees me until I was in my 40’s. 🙂 And yes, it brings freedom!
We probably all have our own versions of a “pizza story.” Most of the time, I feel like I’m trying to measure up to my own expectations more than anyone else’s. sigh. I’m looking forward to getting the book; I have it on my “books to read” list. So grateful for a God who sees beyond the surface, and loves my heart. ((sweet blessings)) xoxo
You’re right, Brenda, about our pizza stories. More than one person here has shared that they have one. I know what you mean about setting the bar high for yourself. I tend to compare myself more with my own expectations as well! Yes, God loves our hearts.
Betsy, I love this! Such encouragement. I have been there, just recently as a matter of fact. We put so much pressure on ourselves as women, don’t we? I am loving Kristine’s book and am so glad she is putting comparison where it belongs- in the garbage. Thanks for sharing. (hugs)
Oh Abby. I know what you mean. I’m so happy for Kristine’s message to get out too. Hugs back atcha, Girl!
Thank you for the positive thoughts about the book, Abby. You should be getting the print copy in the mail soon!
Wow, Betsy this is such great encouragement to help us conquer those ‘not-good-enough’ fears. I think we all have them lurking around and Satan loves to bring them to the fore whenever he gets the chance. Remembering how God sees us can help us be the overcomers He made us to be.
Thank you my friend!
Yes, you are definitely an over-comer, Marva! The Lord has such great plans for you. Keep spreading the shine!
Great reminder Betsy! Just when I think I’m starting to get past the “not good enough” lie the enemy throws it back in my face. I need to keep repeating the truth about how God sees me on a daily basis. Thanks for the great encouragement today.
You and me both, Laura! I need to remind myself daily of truth. Every. Day. 🙂
You and me both, Laura! I need to remind myself daily of truth. Every. Day. 🙂
I am chosen.
Thanks for making me smile! It is so easy to forget how much God loves me until I see it in print, you know?